Christmas For the Lonely

Christmas is a joyous time for some and a grievous time for others.  I'm not sure if I'll even say it's a joyous time for "most" and a grievous time for "some", because it seems that there are enough who hurt during this season that the split seems more and more even.

Several reasons are to blame for the latter's pain.  First, Christmas is a family celebration, and while many have family with which to celebrate, some of them are still haunted by the memories of lost loved ones during this time, be it a parent, a sibling, or a child.  Then there are those who have no family with which to celebrate the holiday.  While all of the pageantry surrounding the holiday is constantly advertising family time, those without are only ever reminded of their void.  Secondly, related to the first, some have family but past vocalized paranoias, hateful words, and (seemingly) unavoidable drama have ran a wedge between those connected by blood.  Those who were at one time loved ones have now become avoided ones, although the tears drummed up when the subject is broached proves that the love isn't gone -- just pain has been added.  Thirdly, the holiday season is so entrenched in the cultural celebrations that the real reason is at worst unknown to some and at best an agenda to others.  In other words some are completely unaware of "the reason for the season", and others claim to know it but their legalistic recitation of "Keep Christ in Christmas" is more an agenda than a celebration.  So the idea of Immanuel ("God with us"), itself the hope of Christmas, is never allowed time to sink in for the lost.  The holiday becomes all about the cultural and social celebration, and never about Jesus.

Many feel the pain of having to endure the holidays from the sidelines.  The movies show Christmas sideliners have "happy endings", but in real life the happy ending is only when the season is over.  But there is hope.  Let me offer five (hopefully) encouraging truths:

1.  God sees you.  

Though everyone else's celebrations, meals, giving and receiving of gifts, and posted online pictures may make you feel invisible, know one thing: You're not invisible.  God sees you.  The God of the Bible has His eyes in every place so that even if one tries to hide, they can not (Jeremiah 23:23-24). "Where shall I go from your Spirit?  Where shall I flee from your presence?  If ascend to heaven, you are there!  If I make my bed in Sheol you are there!" (Ps. 139:7-8).  You may feel alone, but you are not.  Though every other face be turned away from you, there is one face that won't be.  He sees you and He know you.

2. God promises to be near to you.

If #1 above was left alone it would convey the idea that God is a security guard who watches us from his heavenly office via security camera.  That isn't the case.  He sees because He's here.  Matthew's Gospel account begins with the promise that the child to be born will be called Immanuel (which means "God with us", Matt. 1:23); Matthew then ends with the risen Jesus telling His disciples He'll be with them until the end of the age (28:20).  For you who are sitting lonely and broken, hear the hope from the Psalmist: "The Lord is near to the brokenhearted, and saves the crushed in spirit" (34:15).  Let these words sink in.  Brokenness doesn't make one unattractive to God, but more attractive.  He's looking for the broken, and He'll even allow brokenness as a means to draw one to Himself (because in our dullness, that's what is often required to draw us!)  Allow your brokenness to draw you near Him.

3. The Kingdom belongs to such as you. 

In one of my favorite quotes from the Lord Jesus, He says, "Blessed are the poor in spirit; for theirs is the Kingdom of heaven" (Matt. 5:3).  The Kingdom of God is His reign through His Son, experienced presently by those with faith and one day in fullness by all who are His.  It is Jesus' Kingdom, and yet, if you are the broken calling on Him for help and grace, it is yours.  What an incredible promise.  Don't pull yourself up by your bootstraps.  Recognize your bootstraps are broken and ask Jesus to make you a new creation.  He will.  As gifts are given this season, know that by faith in Him all spiritual blessings are presently yours (Eph. 1:3), as an eternal inheritance of riches is waiting for you to take hold of one day when He returns (1 Pet. 1:4-5).

4. God came for you.

In the film the Day After Tomorrow (SPOILER ALERT -- although if you have cable surely you've seen it by now) Jake Gyllenhaal is stuck in a New York library study by a fireplace during a sudden ice age, waiting with his friends for his climatologist dad (Dennis Quaid) to come pick him up and save him.  After many days and many deaths, dad shows up, they embrace (ow, I just got something in my eye) and son says, "You came", to which dad responds, "Of course I did!"  

In our brokenness, sinfulness, and hopelessness, God didn't just let us die.  In Christ, He came.  And not only did He come, but He stayed until His work was finished (John 19:30).  And He left His Spirit to those who look to Him for life.  Let your loneliness drive you to faith.  He's promised He'll send His Spirit to us if we ask Him (Luke 11:13), and His Spirit is the Spirit of comfort (Acts 9:31).  He came for you once, and He'll come for you again.

Don't be embittered this holiday season by everyone else's joyful experience though you might be overpowered by your loneliness.  Let the joy of others be your joy.  "Rejoice with those who rejoice" (Rom. 12:15).  I'm excited to see immediate family in about a week, some whom I haven't seen in a year and a half and others for two years.  I'm blessed and I know it.  Will you rejoice with me?  I'm mourning with you today.  

Infinitely more importantly, the Lord mourns with you.  And the most important part of that last sentence is the last two words: With you.  He isn't far off, and you don't have to be alone.  Perhaps this could be the holiday season where you experience for the first time the true meaning of Christmas: In Christ God came, and that to seek and save the lost, to comfort the brokenhearted, and to give new life to the dead.   It's Satan's will for you to play dead this season; but it's God's will for you to have life in Him ... and life abundantly.  Receive the gift!  You're not alone -- God is with us.